Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

© 2018 Sophia Learning, LLC.

Are you ready to write Touchstone 1?

The narrative below provides an example of an advanced level composition. As you read through the
narrative, notice the techniques that the author used to make the story more interesting and draw you, the
reader, into the experience. Although, as with most writing, there remains room for improvement, this sample
narrative is focused, organized, and engaging. The answers to the reflection questions that follow the
narrative show insight into the author’s intended audience and purpose.

Amanda Brown

English Composition

January 17, 2018

Why I Believe in Sharing Good Food

I believe in sharing meals with loved ones. Food is obviously an important

component in keeping us alive, but in America today we have lost the importance of food in

connecting with those around us. We’re all just grasping for the next Big Mac or soda and

moving on with our day. I used to think that food was just something delicious or filling, but

then I learned how good food can be at connecting people.

My mom has always been a great cook. When I was a kid, we had a home-cooked

dinner almost every night. She calls herself a “peasant cook” because what she makes is

not usually fancy. But still I remember crispy fried chicken alongside creamy mashed

potatoes smothered in rich gravy or pots of spaghetti sauce that filled the house with an

herby, tomato smell as they bubbled throughout the day. Our house was often full of my

Comment [CS1]: This opening paragraph does a great job
of communicating the overall significance behind the story
you’re about to tell.

Comment [CS2]: Good use of narrative language here.

Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

© 2018 Sophia Learning, LLC.

parents’ friends, particularly after church on Sunday afternoon. “It’s a sin to not have

enough food for people,” my mother would say, only half joking, so peasant food or not,

there was always a lot of it. In hindsight, I see the importance in these meals and a house

full of friends and family, but at the time I just thought it was a part of normal life.

Everything changed when my grandfather died. I was only 20 years old. He had

always been very healthy but then cancer struck and he died far too soon, at the age of 67.

I drove with my mom, brother, and sister from Utah to Oregon where all my extended family

was gathering for his funeral.

“I can’t believe he’s actually gone,” said my brother, Samuel.

“Yeah, I can’t believe that when we get to this end of this trip we’re not going to hear

Grandpa telling a bunch of crazy stories or teasing jokes,” my mom replied.

Our drive seemed dotted with memories as much as with trees, hills, and semi-

trucks. All of us were quiet with our own memories of spending time with Grandpa. My

grandpa was only the second significant death in my life and it felt very strange to lose that

important link in my family chain. At his funeral, everyone talked about him with love and

laughed over his terrible puns, but I was too sad to laugh.

A couple of days later, most of the extended family had gone home and my

grandparents’ house, which had been crammed to capacity, started to have more breathing

room. We were down to just my immediate family, my uncle Joe and his son, Luke, and my

grandmother. During this period, our huge clan had not given much thought to eating, and

we had just been eating out or snacking as we were all so busy and stricken with grief. But

on this last night, my uncle offered to make a big, home-cooked dinner. As I sat down at my

Comment [CS3]: This is a good signaling phrase to show
the reader that there will now be a shift in the tone and
timeline of the story.

Comment [CS4]: I really like how you combine different
narrative techniques in this paragraph. You include
dialogue, explain your emotions, use concrete detail to
describe your surroundings, and figurative language to
enhance your descriptions. This really helps the reader
experience the action along with you!

Comment [CS5]: You do a great job of focusing on only the
relevant events, glossing over the “filler” so that your
narrative doesn’t get off track. This really helps with the
flow of your story.

Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

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grandparents’ family-sized table, I heard the ocean crashing softly outside the open

window. I then noticed the crisp green salad, loaded with fresh lettuce, carrots, cucumbers,

green onions, and olives. Then I saw the crusty bread with white butter and the fluffy

mashed potatoes, whipped with butter, salt, and pepper. I felt my mouth fill with saliva

almost immediately. And then there was the fish. We were on the coast, after all, so my

uncle baked halibut filets that were lightly crispy and perfectly flaky. They smelled of rich

butter and just a bit of the Pacific and almost melted in my mouth when I took a bite.

After my first bite of fish I couldn’t help groaning. “This is so, so good.”

“Mmm hmm,” said others, diving in from places around the table.

“You know your grandfather loved fresh fish,” my grandmother added. “It was one of

his favorite things about living here.”

Unlike the memories at the funeral, this comment felt like it was both true to my

grandfather’s memory and a recognition of the greatness we had lost.

But the thing I remember even more than the food was the connection I felt to my

family. I looked around the table and saw people that I loved, my uncle Joe, Luke, my mom,

my little brother and sister, and, most importantly, my grandmother, who had just lost the

love of her life. Even though we had just suffered a huge loss, the meal felt like it was

healing us and connecting us. I remember so strongly how the meal, the “breaking of

bread” as they say, seemed like the perfect ending to this hard experience. This is a lesson

that I have never forgotten and now I love to share meals with friends and family in times of

happiness and sadness. This is why I believe in sharing meals with loved ones.

Comment [CS6]: I can almost visualize this exchange. This
is great.

Comment [CS7]: This is a really strong conclusion to the
story, as it ties back to the purpose of the narrative.

Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

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Think About Your Writing:

1. What narrative techniques did you use to bring your story to life? (2-3 sentences)

Sophia says: Did you use vivid description, sensory details, and/or dialogue to pull the reader in? Provide two

examples from your essay in which you “show” the reader rather than “tell” the reader. EXAMPLE: I was

running late for the meeting vs. I glanced at the clock, grabbed my briefcase, and sprinted for the elevator.

I really enjoy the fact that narrative writing uses figurative language and sensory details to

make a point. It allows me to feel more creative in my writing and allows me to have fun

with the words and phrases I use to paint a picture for the reader. For example, I used

sensory details and vivid language in this passage to describe some of the food: “Then I

saw the crusty bread with white butter and the fluffy mashed potatoes, whipped with butter,

salt, and pepper. I felt my mouth fill with saliva almost immediately.” I also used figurative

language in the following sentence to bring it to life: “Our drive seemed dotted with

memories as much as with trees, hills, and semi-trucks.”

2. How did your purpose and audience shape the way in which you wrote your narrative? (3-

4 sentences) Sophia says: The hypothetical audience goes beyond the individuals evaluating your

composition. What groups or individuals did you have in mind when you wrote your narrative and how did

consideration of your audience and purpose influence the way you wrote?

Because of my purpose, which was to tell about how I learned to value sharing food with

loved ones, I tried to make sure I made the food sound delicious because that would draw

the audience in. I also wanted to tell a story that was meaningful to me, not only in that it

involved the loss of my grandfather, who I loved, but also an important realization for me

Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

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about the power of food. When I was writing this narrative, I imagined my audience as

young adults who have probably experienced the loss of a grandparent as well.

3. Provide a concrete example from your narrative that shows how you have directed your

writing towards this audience and purpose. (3-5 sentences) Sophia says: Consider including a

quotation from your essay and explaining how it

is intended to appeal to your audience and purpose.

Alternatively, you may want to describe a theme, tone, or narrative technique that you used and explain how it

is intended to appeal to your audience and purpose.

One concrete thing I did to appeal to this audience was to mention my age when this

happened, which was 20, which is probably close to the same age as my ideal audience. I

also included related details from when I was a child to show how I developed from my

experiences then with the events of the narrative up to now. I also appealed to my broader

audience by telling an experience that was important but also common so that probably a

lot of people can relate. “And then there was the fish. We were on the coast, after all, so my

uncle baked halibut fillets that were lightly crispy and perfectly flaky. They smelled of rich

butter and just a bit of the Pacific and almost melted in my mouth when I took a bite.” In this

example, I wanted my reader to experience the sensations of tasting freshly caught fish

served in a traditional way. It reinforces the idea that although we had suffered a major loss

that we could still find comfort in food and family.

SCORING APPEARS ON THE NEXT PAGE

Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

© 2018 Sophia Learning, LLC.

SCORING for Sample Touchstone 1

The sample narrative was scored according to the Touchstone 2 Rubric, which includes Narrative Focus,

Narrative Structure, Narrative Language, Conventions, and responses to the “Think About your Writing”

questions. This Touchstone is worth a total of 100 possible points. The area scores are explained below.

Narrative Focus (5 possible points)

The narrative clearly sets the scene and relays the significance of the events described, which meets the

requirements of the prompt. The writer has made a connection between experiencing the death of a loved

one and the family gathering to share a meal together.

The details provided are relevant to the story line and support the writer’s purpose to create a link between a

loss and a greater understanding of the bonds that are formed at a dinner table.

Area Score: Advanced 5/5

Narrative Flow (5 possible points)

The narrative is arranged in a logical manner in which the sequence of ideas flows naturally and is easy to

follow.

Area Score: Advanced 5/5

Narrative Structure (15 possible points)

The narrative has a logical flow to the events described. The writer refers to her distant past and moves

smoothly toward events in her more recent past, and the reader can easily follow the action. The reader

moves with the writer through her childhood memories, to her young adult experience with loss, and then to

her eventual understanding of the importance of “breaking bread” together.

The beginning and ending paragraphs serve as effective bookends to the story because they reiterate the

importance of family and the connection of family to food.

Area Score: Advanced 15/15

Narrative Language (15 possible points)

Sophia Pathways for College Credit – English Composition I

© 2018 Sophia Learning, LLC.

The writer uses sensory language to effectively describe the food, which adds vitality to the narrative. Many

details provided are concrete and specific – “crispy fried chicken alongside creamy mashed potatoes

smothered in rich gravy” and “They smelled of rich butter and just a bit of the Pacific” – which draw the reader

into the story by appealing to the senses.

The reader feels a vague sense of loss at the grandfather’s death but doesn’t really “see” him, nor sense what

he meant to the narrator. Why was he such an important link in the family? Sharing a specific memory –

allowing readers to hear his voice or glimpse his personality – would have “shown” rather than “told.” Use of

dialogue was minimal though effective.

Area Score: Proficient 12/15

Conventions (5 possible points)

The writer made very few capitalization, usage, or punctuation errors and the errors did not impede the

reader’s understanding of the essay.

Area Score: Proficient 4/5

“Think About Your Writing” Responses (5 possible points)

The writer has reflected thoughtfully on the process of writing the narrative. The writer shows insight into her

purpose in writing and demonstrates an understanding of her intended audience as well. Response length

guidelines were met or exceeded.

Area Score: Advanced 5/5

TOTAL SCORE: ADVANCED 46/50

Overall, this narrative effectively tells a story that draws the reader in. The writer remains focused throughout

the narrative, including relevant details while using a logical progression to tell the story. The use of figurative

language, concrete description, and dialogue contribute to the sense that the story is being “shown” rather

than told, though the narrative would benefit from more of all of these elements. The reflection question

answers show that the writer has thoughtfully considered her audience and purpose. All assignment

requirements have been met, and the narrative contained very few errors.

Comment [SL3]: This is a detailed thesis statement clearly
showing that the two subjects will be contrasted as opposed
to compared. The thesis tells us what the two subjects being
contrasted are (the cities of Budapest and Minneapolis), as
well as the points of contrast that will be explored in the
essay (weather, cost of living, and population
demographics).

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

Are you ready to write Touchstone 2.1?

The sample below provides an example of an essay in the proficient to advanced range. As you read
through the essay, notice how the writer employs techniques characteristic of comparison/contrast writing
in the informative mode.

Angel Martinez

English Composition I

January 15, 2018

The Tale of Two Cities

Many cities around the world have been built along a river. Some “twin” cities

have developed along both banks of a single river. The cities of Buda and Pest, divided

by the Danube River in Hungary, became the city of Budapest in 1873. Other twin cities,

such as Minneapolis and St. Paul in Minnesota, have retained a river, in this case, the

Budapest and Minneapolis are relatively even on a world latitude scale (Budapest is

somewhat north and east of Minneapolis, more closely aligned with Seattle), the cities

Comment [SL2]: Nice job connecting the subjects in a
meaningful way. Though the details you’ve provided, we
can see the connection between the subjects and why they
work well for this type of essay.

Comment [SL1]: Good choice of topic. It isn’t too big or
too small of a topic, and there are enough similarities or
differences between the two to explore within an essay.

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

Spring begins in April in Budapest when sunshine is abundant and temperatures

rise quickly. Summers are long and warm, with an average temperature of 77 degrees

Fahrenheit. Humidity is low for the most part. Temperatures remain in the high 60s

through mid-November, but rain becomes more frequent in the fall. Finally, the winter

season in Budapest brings temperatures that, on average, remain in the 30-40 degree

Fahrenheit range. Snow falls, but in small amounts. The coldest month is January with

an average temperature of 30 degrees Fahrenheit. There is also frequent fog in the

winter months.

Minneapolis, on the other hand, is less temperate than Budapest. Spring in

Minneapolis arrives later on average and is shortened. It isn’t unusual to have snow in

April, nor is it unusual to have snow in October in Minneapolis. The three summer

months of June, July, and August are humid and see almost half of the year’s

precipitation in the form of sometimes violent thunderstorms. Tornadoes can also occur

in the spring and summer months in Minneapolis. Autumn is often brief and

characterized by blue skies and cooling temperatures. Winters can be brutal with snow,

sleet, freezing rain, ice, and blizzard conditions. The average temperature for the month

of January in Minneapolis is 4 degrees Fahrenheit.

The cost of living in Budapest is much lower than the cost of living in

Minneapolis. Of course, wages are lower too – the major industries are manufacturing

and tourism – but it is quite easy to live well on an average salary in the city. For

example, rent for a one-bedroom apartment near the City Center costs an average of

138,000 forints, or around $532 in U.S. dollars. Monthly access to the internet costs

Comment [SL4]: Good use of a contrast transitional phrase
here.

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

Comment [SL5]: Add a transitional word or phrase here,
such as “However,” to more clearly indicate that this line is
a contrast between the cost of gasoline/utilities in Budapest
and the cost of gasoline/utilities in Minneapolis.

Comment [SL6]: I would recommend using a transitional
word or phrase, such as “In contrast,” here to more clearly
indicate that you’re contrasting the prices between the two
cities.

1
about $18, and a bottle of mid-range domestic wine costs only $5. Gasoline costs more

in Budapest, as do monthly utilities such as heat and water.

The cost of living in Minneapolis is about 5% higher than the U.S. national

average, but still much lower than in other U.S. major cities like Chicago or Los

Angeles. Unemployment is low and the economy is diverse, with no single industry

dominating the market. Monthly rent for a one-bedroom apartment in Minneapolis is

between $1400 and $1700, with utilities an average of an additional $150 a month. The

cost for access to the Internet varies by speed, but rounds out to about $45 per month.

A bottle of good domestic wine will cost you around $15 in Minneapolis. Gas prices

change almost daily but average around $2.50 per gallon. Drivers in Budapest pay

almost $5 per gallon.

The population of Budapest is approximately 1.74 million people. When taking

into account the entire metropolitan and commuter area, this number climbs to 3.3

million. The city itself has experienced negative growth over the past 30 years, falling

from a population of 2.2 million in 1989. The vast majority of residents in Budapest are

Hungarian by nationality: 84%. Other nationalities include Romans, which make up

about 3% of the population, Germans who account for 1%, and Slovaks, Romanians,

and Croats, who make up the remainder.

Minneapolis and its surrounding communities have a similar population to

metropolitan Budapest – approximately 3.3 million inhabitants. However, population

continues to grow in Minneapolis and has increased every year since 1990. Minneapolis

is also much more diverse than Budapest. Whites (mainly of Scandinavian and German

descent) make up 64% of the population, African Americans are nearly 20%, Hispanics

Comment [SL7]: Good use of a contrast word here to
indicate that Minneapolis’ population is growing, which
contrasts with the population decline in Budapest.

it’s historical castles and ruin pubs in Budapest or peaceful lakes and greenery in

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

stand at 10%, and Asians around 6%. Minneapolis is also known as a gay-friendly

community, while homosexuality is quite hidden in Budapest.

Both Minneapolis and Budapest are cities built along the banks of a major river.

Although Buda and Pest joined to form one city along the Danube, the cities of St. Paul

and Minneapolis have maintained separate governments and identities on either side of

the Mississippi. Budapest and Minneapolis are comparable in size, but differ in climate,

cost of living, and demographic makeup. Both cities offer much for the traveler, whether

Minneapolis. Combined visits for both cities reached a high of 34 million last year, and

34 million people can’t be wrong!

(812 words)

Comment [SL8]: Nice job on the conclusion here. You

topic slightly by discussing tourism. This creates a sense of
circular motion and gives a satisfying end to this essay.

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

Think About Your Writing

1. Did you use the point-by-point or block method to organize your body paragraphs?
What made you decide to organize your essay in this way? (3-4 sentences) Sophia
says: Consider the ways a comparison/contrast essay can be organized. Which
organization did you choose and why?

For my essay, I choose the point-by-point method of organization. I felt that either
method of organization would have worked well. However, the contrasts between
the two cities in regards to weather, cost of living, and population demographics
seemed like they were a little more obvious and easier to point out to the reader
when I used the point-by-point method. It helped me to emphasize the contrasts
between the two cities, one point at a time.

2. In what ways did writing a comparison/contrast essay differ from the narrative essay you
wrote in Touchstone 1? Give specific examples. (3-4 sentences) Sophia says: Consider
how the structure, point of view, and purpose of the two essays differ.

Writing a comparison/contrast essay felt very different from writing a narrative
essay. First of all, when writing a narrative, there was no real formalized structure
to follow and I didn’t have to create a thesis statement. The comparison/contrast
essay has a much more defined structure and does require a thesis statement. It
follows a more academic approach to writing as well, and maintains an objective
tone with the purpose of informing the audience of the differences between the
two subjects. In my narrative essay, it was just the opposite. I incorporated
dialogue, first person language, and my own ideas since my purpose was to tell a
story.

3. Remember that the writing process is a recursive process, and your first draft of an
essay is rarely your last. What part of the draft did you struggle with? (3-4 sentences)
Sophia says: Think about how you could improve the draft if you continued the writing
process with revision and editing.

Overall I really enjoyed writing a comparison/contrast essay. However, there
were a few elements that I struggled with a little bit. It was sometimes difficult to
maintain an objective tone in the essay. Since I have lived in both cities, I have a
strong connection to them, and refraining from injecting my own opinions was
difficult. It was also difficult to determine which specific points of contrast I
wanted to focus on since there are so many similarities and differences between
the two cities that are very interesting.

SCORING APPEARS ON THE NEXT PAGE

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

SCORING for Sample Touchstone 2.1

The sample essay was evaluated according to the Touchstone 2.1 Rubric, which considers elements of a
comparison/contrast essay, the thesis statement, organization, style and tone, conventions, and
responses to the “Think About Your Writing” questions. Each rubric area is evaluated according to the
performance level.

Elements of a Comparison/Contrast Essay

Overall the author does a nice job making the connection between subjects very clear, and the
organization used is appropriate for a comparison/contrast essay. There are a few opportunities;
however, in which transitional words or phrases can be used to more effectively convey contrasts
between the two cities.

Area Score: Proficient 13/15

Thesis Statement

The thesis statement, “While the locations of Budapest and Minneapolis are relatively even on a world
latitude scale (Budapest is somewhat north and east of Minneapolis, more closely aligned with Seattle),
the cities have distinct differences in weather, cost of living, and population demographics,” is clear and
effectively communicates the two subjects being contrasted (Minneapolis and Budapest) as well as the
three points of contrast that will be explored in the essay (weather, cost of living, and population
demographics).

Area Score: Advanced 10 /10

Organization

The essay is well organized, and contains all of the required elements of a comparison/contrast essay: an
introductory paragraph, a thesis statement, adequate body paragraphs organized in the point-by-point
method, and an effective concluding paragraph.

Area Score: Advanced 10 /10

Style and Tone

The writing maintains an objective tone throughout, appropriate for informative writing. A wide variety of
sentence structures and thoughtful word choices contribute to the overall style and tone of the essay.

Area Score: Advanced 5/5

Sophia Pathways – English Composition I

Conventions

There are few/no errors in grammar, punctuation, spelling, capitalization, formatting, or usage.

Area Score: Advanced 5/5

Think About Your Writing

It is clear that the writer thoroughly and thoughtfully answered the questions. All questions meet or
exceed response length guidelines.

Area Score: Advanced 5/5

TOTAL SCORE: ADVANCED 48/50

Touchstones are projects that illustrate your comprehension of the course material, help you to refine skills, and demonstrate application of knowledge. You

can work on a Touchstone anytime, but you can’t submit it for grading until you have completed the unit’s Challenges. After you’ve submitted a Touchstone, it

will be graded and counted towards your final course score.

Touchstone 1: Narrative Essay

ASSIGNMENT: Write a narrative essay using the techniques and elements of narrative writing that you have learned in this unit. Your essay must be

approximately 500-800 words long.

 Sample Narrative Essay In order to foster learning and growth, all essays you submit must be newly written specifically for this course. Any recycled

work will be sent back with a 0, and you will be given one attempt to redo the Touchstone.

A. Instructions

Choose a topic that enables you to tell a short, interesting personal story. Your story can be funny, suspenseful, meaningful, or exciting, but it must focus on

one event. For example, if you decide to write about traveling to Denmark, you should not write about the entire trip. Choose one event (e.g., an afternoon

you spent bicycling on an island, or your first taste of smoked herring, or your visit to the childhood home of Hans Christian Anderson) and tell a detailed story

that focuses on that event.

The following are some ideas that can help you to select a topic for your story:

• Firsts: Think of a “first” in your life and describe that moment in detail.

• Proud Moment: Choose a moment when you felt proud about an accomplishment.

• Adversity: Describe a time when you had to think or act quickly to overcome a challenge.

• Travel: Recall a memorable experience you had while visiting an interesting place.

B. Think About Your Writing

Below your completed narrative, include answers to all of the following reflection questions:

1. Which narrative techniques did you use to bring your story to life? (2-3 sentences) Sophia says: Did you use vivid description, sensory details, and/or

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UNIT 1 — TOUCHSTONE 1: Narrative Essay
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dialogue to engage readers? Provide two examples from your essay in which you “show” readers rather than “tell” them. EXAMPLE: A sentence such as “I

glanced at the clock, grabbed my briefcase, and sprinted for the elevator” uses more descriptive language than simply saying, “I was running late for the

meeting.”

2. How did your purpose and audience shape the way in which you wrote your narrative? (3-4 sentences) Sophia says: Your hypothetical audience extends

beyond the people who will evaluate your narrative. Which individuals or groups were you addressing when you wrote your narrative, and how did

consideration of your audience and your purpose influence the way in which you wrote it?

3. Provide a concrete example from your narrative that shows how you have written specifically for this audience and purpose. (3-5 sentences) Sophia

says: Consider including a quotation from your essay and explaining how it was written to appeal to your audience, and to accomplish

your purpose.

Alternatively, you might describe a theme, tone, or narrative technique that you used and explain how it was intended to appeal to your audience and achieve

your purpose.

C. Narrative Guidelines

DIRECTIONS: Refer to the checklist below throughout the writing process. Do not submit your Touchstone until your essay meets all of the guidelines.

Narrative Focus and Flow

❒ Are all of the details in your story relevant to your purpose?

❒ Are the events presented in a logical order that is easy to follow?

❒ Is your story 500-800 words in length? If not, which details do you need to add or subtract?

Narrative Structure

❒ Is there an opening paragraph that introduces the setting, characters, and situation?

❒ Are there middle paragraphs that describe the progression of events?

❒ Is there a closing paragraph that provides a thorough resolution to the story?

Narrative Language and Techniques

❒ Have you incorporated narrative language and techniques (e.g., figurative language, concrete and sensory details, dialogue, and vivid description)?

❒ Can examples of narrative language and techniques be found throughout your story, or are they only evident in some places?

Conventions

❒ Have you double-checked for correct grammar, punctuation, spelling, formatting, and capitalization?

❒ Have you proofread to find and correct typos?

Before You Submit

❒ Have you included your name, date, and course in the top left corner of the page?

❒ Have you answered all of the “Think About Your Writing” questions?

❒ Is your essay between 500 and 800 words in length (2-3 pages)?

D. Scoring

Your composition and reflection will be scored according to the Touchstone 1 Rubric, which evaluates the narrative focus, narrative flow, narrative structure,

narrative language and techniques, use of conventions (grammar, punctuation, etc.), and your answers to the “Think About your Writing” questions above.

E. Rubric

  Advanced (100%) Proficient (85%) Acceptable (75%) Needs
Improvement
(50%)

Non-Performance
(0%)

Narrative Focus

Present a focused,
meaningful narrative.

The composition is consistently
focused, and details are
relevant and specific.

The composition is focused and
details are relevant and specific.
However, a few details and
descriptions detract slightly
from the focus.

The composition is mostly
focused and the majority of
details are relevant and
specific. However, there are
several details and
descriptions that detract
from the focus.

The composition does not
have a consistent focus.

The composition exhibits no
evidence of a focus.

Narrative Flow

Tell the story using a
logical, smooth sequence
of events.

The sequence of events and
details is logical and easy to
follow throughout the
composition.

The sequence of events and
details is logical and easy to
follow throughout the
composition, with a few minor
exceptions.

The sequence of events and
details is easy to follow
throughout most of the
composition; however, some
areas are poorly sequenced
or confusing.

The events and details are
primarily poorly sequenced
and difficult to follow.

The sequence of events
and details is illogical.
Readers cannot follow the
progression of the
composition.

Narrative Structure

Develop a clear
beginning, middle, and
end.

The composition has a clear
and well-developed beginning,
middle, and end. The opening
paragraph(s) thoroughly
introduce the setting,
characters, and situation. The
middle paragraphs thoroughly
describe the progression of
events. The closing
paragraph(s) provide a
thorough resolution to the
narrative.

The composition has a clear
and sufficiently developed
beginning, middle, and end. The
opening paragraph(s)
adequately introduce the
setting, characters, and
situation. The middle
paragraphs adequately
describe the progression of
events. The closing
paragraph(s) provide an
adequate resolution to the
narrative.

The composition has a clear
beginning, middle, and end;
however, one of the three
sections is minimally
developed.

The composition lacks a
clear beginning, middle, or
end; or, two of the three
sections are minimally
developed.

The composition lacks a
clear beginning, middle, and
end; or, all three sections
are minimally developed.

Narrative Language
and Techniques

Use narrative language
and techniques
competently.

Uses narrative language and
techniques (e.g., concrete and
sensory details, figurative
language, vivid description,
dialogue, pacing, and plot
development) effectively
throughout the composition.

Uses narrative language and
techniques (e.g., concrete and
sensory details, figurative
language, vivid description,
dialogue, pacing, and plot
development) effectively in the
majority of the composition.

Uses narrative language and
techniques (e.g., concrete
and sensory details,
figurative language, vivid
description, dialogue,
pacing, and plot
development) effectively in
some parts of the
composition.

Uses narrative language and
techniques (e.g., concrete
and sensory details,
figurative language, vivid
description, dialogue, pacing,
and plot development) rarely
in the composition.

Does not use narrative
language and techniques
(e.g., concrete and sensory
details, figurative language,
vivid description, dialogue,
pacing, and plot
development) in the
composition.

Conventions

Demonstrate command of
standard English
grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
and usage.

There are few, if any, negligible
errors in grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
formatting, and usage.

There are occasional minor
errors in grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
formatting, and usage.

There are some significant
errors in grammar,
punctuation, spelling,
capitalization, formatting,
and usage.

There are frequent
significant errors in grammar,
punctuation, spelling,
capitalization, formatting, and
usage.

There are consistent
significant errors in
grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
formatting, and usage.

  Advanced (100%) Proficient (85%) Acceptable (75%) Needs
Improvement
(50%)

Non-Performance
(0%)

Think About Your
Writing

Reply to reflection
questions thoroughly and
thoughtfully.

Demonstrates thoughtful
reflection; consistently includes
insights, observations, and/or
examples in all responses.
Answers all reflection questions
effectively, following or
exceeding response length
guidelines.

Demonstrates thoughtful
reflection; includes multiple
insights, observations, and/or
examples. Answers all reflection
questions effectively, following
response length guidelines.

Primarily demonstrates
thoughtful reflection, but
some responses are lacking
in detail or insight. Answers
all reflection questions,
primarily following response
length guidelines.

Shows limited reflection; the
majority of responses are
lacking in detail or insight.
Answers reflection questions
inadequately; may not
answer all of the questions
and/or may not follow
response length guidelines.

Does not answer the
majority of reflection
questions, or the majority of
answers do not follow
response length guidelines.

F. Requirements

• Your narrative must be 500 to 800 words (approximately 2-3 pages) in length.

• Assignment guidelines must be followed or your submission will not be graded.

• Double-space the essay and use one-inch margins.

• Use an easily-readable 12-point font.

• All writing must be appropriate for an academic context.

• Your narrative must be original and written for this assignment.

• Plagiarism of any kind is strictly prohibited.

• Your submission must include your name, the name of the course, the date, and the title of your composition.

• Your submission must include both your narrative and your answers to the “Think About Your Writing” questions.

• Submit only a single file that contains all of the assignment components.

• Acceptable file formats are and x.

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Touchstones are projects that illustrate your comprehension of the course material, help you to refine skills, and demonstrate application of knowledge. You

can work on a Touchstone anytime, but you can’t submit it for grading until you have completed the Unit’s Challenges. After you’ve submitted a Touchstone, it

will be graded and counted toward your final course score.

Touchstone 2.1: Comparison/Contrast Essay

ASSIGNMENT: Write a 3-4 page (approximately 700-1000 words) comparison/contrast essay in the informative mode. In addition, you must answer the

“Think About Your Writing” questions, described below, beneath your essay.

 Sample Comparison/Contrast Essay In order to foster learning and growth, all essays you submit must be newly written specifically for this course.

Any recycled work will be sent back with a 0, and you will be given one attempt to redo the Touchstone.

A. Instructions

Begin by choosing a topic for your comparison/contrast essay. You are free to select your own topic, or you may use one of the sample topics listed below.

However, you should choose a topic that you have knowledge of so that you have sufficient points of comparison or contrast to discuss in your essay. You will

need to compare or contrast two or three primary points about the two subjects you choose to write about, resulting in an essay with either four or six body

paragraphs, an introductory paragraph, and a conclusion.

• Compare or contrast two cities you’ve visited or that you’ve lived in

• Compare or contrast two members of your family

• Compare or contrast two sources of news

• Compare or contrast two singers in different music genres

• Compare or contrast two historical figures

• Compare or contrast two artists (for example, Vincent van Gogh and Pablo Picasso or Keith Haring and Andy Warhol)

• Compare or contrast two eras in time

• Compare or contrast two television series

• Compare or contrast two types of technologies (for example, Android and Apple phones or PlayStation and Xbox)

• Compare or contrast two medical topics (for example, traditional medicine and modern medicine or doctors and midwives)

Not Submitted Submitted Scored
When you’re ready to upload your document, click here. SUBMIT TOUCHSTONE

 It takes 5-7 business days for a Touchstone to be graded once it’s been submitted.

UNIT 2 — TOUCHSTONE 2.1: Comparison/Contrast Essay
SCORE

-/50

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https://app.sophia.org/spcc/english-composition-i-3

Remember that the two subjects you choose should have a meaningful connection so that you can draw comparisons or contrasts between the two.

Your thesis should convey the main idea of the essay and clearly articulate what two topics you are comparing/contrasting. Because you are writing in the

informative mode for this essay, you should use objective language. Remember that for this essay, you are not trying to persuade or convince the audience

that one thing is better or worse than the other; you are instead informing the reader about the similarities or differences between the two subjects in an

objective manner.

Please note that if you use information from any outside sources, you will need to cite them. Plagiarism is not acceptable in academic writing. The following

resources will be helpful to you if you need to cite any sources:

. Purdue Online Writing Lab’s APA Formatting and Style Guide

a. This site includes a comprehensive overview of APA style, as well as individual pages with guidelines for specific citation types.

. Frequently Asked Questions About APA Style

a. This page on the official APA website addresses common questions related to APA formatting. The “References,” “Punctuation,” and “Grammar and

Writing Style” sections will be the most useful to your work in this course.

. APA Style: Quick Answers—References

a. This page on the official APA Style website provides numerous examples of reference list formatting for various source types.

B. Think About Your Writing

After you’ve drafted your essay, answer the following questions about your writing. Include answers to all of the questions below your essay.

1. Did you use the point-by-point or block method to organize your body paragraphs? What made you decide to organize your essay in this way (3-4

sentences)? Sophia says: Consider the ways a comparison/contrast essay can be organized. Which organization did you choose and why?

2. In what ways did writing a comparison/contrast essay differ from the Narrative essay you wrote in Touchstone 1? Give specific examples (3-4 sentences).

Sophia says: Consider how the structure, point of view, and purpose of the two essays differ.

3. Remember that the writing process is a recursive process, and your first draft of an essay is rarely your last. What part of the draft did you struggle with

(3-4 sentences)? Sophia says: Think about how you could improve the draft if you continued the writing process with revision and editing.

C. Comparison/Contrast Guidelines

Refer to the checklist below throughout the writing process. Do not submit your Touchstone until your draft meets all of the guidelines.

Elements of a Comparison/Contrast Essay

❒ Are there significant points of comparison or contrast between the two subjects you have selected?

❒ Do you make clear comparisons or contrasts between the two subjects within the body paragraphs of the essay?

❒ Are the body paragraphs organized either by point or by subject?

❒ Have you used transitional words or phrases to indicate points being compared or contrasted?

https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/research_and_citation/apa_style/apa_formatting_and_style_guide/general_format.html

https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/research_and_citation/apa_style/apa_formatting_and_style_guide/general_format.html

https://apastyle.apa.org/learn/faqs/index?_ga=2.108387778.1714049845.1568211418-1848442951.1567702038

https://apastyle.apa.org/learn/faqs/index?_ga=2.108387778.1714049845.1568211418-1848442951.1567702038

https://apastyle.apa.org/learn/quick-guide-on-references?_ga=2.35495777.1714049845.1568211418-1848442951.1567702038

https://apastyle.apa.org/learn/quick-guide-on-references?_ga=2.35495777.1714049845.1568211418-1848442951.1567702038

❒ Does the essay have a clear and consistent focus of comparing and contrasting two subjects?

Thesis Statement

❒ Have you included a clear, focused, and detailed thesis statement?

❒ Does your thesis state the subjects to be compared or contrasted and include the two or three points of comparison or contrast?

❒ Is your thesis a single sentence located in the introductory paragraph?

Organization

❒ Is there an introductory paragraph that contains your thesis statement?

❒ Are there four or six total body paragraphs, each with a clear topic sentence?

❒ Is there a conclusion paragraph with a concluding statement?

❒ Have you used transitions to connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs?

Style and Tone

❒ Is the tone of the essay objective and informative?

❒ Have you carefully considered your word choices?

❒ Is the purpose of your essay clearly to inform the reader about the similarities or differences between the two subjects?

Conventions

❒ Have you checked your essay for grammatical and mechanical errors?

❒ Have you used spell check or another method to check spelling?

Before you Submit

❒ Have you included your name, date, and course at the top left of the page?

❒ Have you completed the “Think About Your Writing” questions?

❒ Is your essay between 3-4 pages (approximately 700-1000 words)?

D. Scoring

Your essay will be scored according to the Touchstone 2.1 Rubric, which considers required elements for a comparison/contrast essay, the thesis statement,

focus, organization, style and tone, conventions, and answers to the “Think About your Writing” questions above.

E. Rubric

  Advanced (100%) Proficient (85%) Acceptable (75%) Needs
Improvement (50%)

Non-
Performance
(0%)

  Advanced (100%) Proficient (85%) Acceptable (75%) Needs
Improvement (50%)

Non-
Performance
(0%)

Comparison/Contrast
Essay Elements

Properly apply elements
of a comparison/contrast
essay.

Makes a clear and meaningful
connection between two
subjects related to one of the
writing prompts; effectively
organizes body paragraphs in
one of the two prescribed
ways and consistently uses
transitional words or phrases
to comparison/contrast ideas.

Makes a clear connection
between two subjects related
to one of the writing prompts;
organizes body paragraphs in
one of the two prescribed
ways and often uses
transitional words or phrases
to comparison/contrast ideas.

Makes a predominately clear
connection between two
subjects related to one of the
writing prompts; organizes
body paragraphs in one of the
two prescribed ways and
occasionally uses transitional
words or phrases to
comparison/contrast ideas.

Makes a connection between
two subjects related to one of
the writing prompts, but the
connection is not very clear or
lacks meaning; attempts to
organize body paragraphs in
one of the two prescribed
ways, but organization could
use some work. May
occasionally use transitional
words or phrases to
comparison/contrast ideas.

Does not make a
connection between two
subjects related to one of
the writing prompts; the
essay lacks organization
and words or phrases
characteristic of a
comparison/contrast essay.

Thesis Statement

State the focused central
claim of the essay with
the clear purpose of
comparing/contrasting
two subjects.

Has a clear, focused, and
detailed thesis expressed in a
single sentence that states the
central claim of the essay; the
thesis statement effectively
communicates the two
subjects that will be compared
or contrasted and the two or
three main points of
comparison/contrast.

Has a clear and focused
thesis expressed in a single
sentence that states the
central claim of the essay; the
thesis statement
communicates the two
subjects that will be
compared or contrasted and
the two or three main points
of comparison/contrast.

Has an acceptable working
thesis that states a claim, but it
may be somewhat unclear or
unfocused or composed of
more than one sentence; the
thesis statement somewhat
communicates the two
subjects that will be compared
or contrasted and the two or
three main points of
comparison/contrast.

Has a working thesis, but it is
not clear and/or focused
and/or it does not state a claim;
the two subjects being
compared or contrasted and
points of comparison/contrast
may not be clearly articulated.

Does not have an
identifiable working thesis
and/or the thesis is
extremely unclear or
unfocused; there are no
subjects being compared
or contrasted.

Organization

Exhibit competent
organization, flow, and
writing techniques.

Includes all of the required
components of an essay,
including an introduction with
a strong thesis, an adequate
number of body paragraphs
(4-6), each with an effective
topic sentence and a
conclusion with an effective
concluding statement; the
sequence of sentences and
paragraphs is logical.

Includes all of the required
components of an essay,
including an introduction with
a thesis, an adequate number
of body paragraphs (4-6),
each with a topic sentence
and a conclusion with a
concluding statement; the
sequence of sentences and
paragraphs is predominantly
logical.

Includes all of the required
components of an essay,
including an introduction with a
thesis, an adequate number of
body paragraphs (4-6), each
with a topic sentence and a
conclusion with a concluding
statement, but some
components may be
ineffective; the sequence of
sentences and paragraphs is
somewhat logical.

Is missing one of the required
components of an essay or
most of the components are
ineffective; the sequence of
sentences and/or paragraphs
is frequently illogical.

Is missing multiple required
components of an essay or
all of the components are
ineffective; the sequence of
sentences and/or
paragraphs is consistently
illogical.

Style and Tone

Establish an informative
tone and make thoughtful
choices.

Demonstrates thoughtful and
effective word choices and
uses a wide variety of
sentence structures;
establishes a consistently
objective and impersonal tone
that is appropriate to an
informative essay.

Demonstrates effective word
choices and uses a variety of
sentence structures;
establishes an objective and
impersonal tone that is
appropriate to an informative
essay, with occasional minor
exceptions.

Demonstrates generally-
effective style choices, but
may include poor word choice
and/or repetitive sentence
structures; primarily
establishes an objective and
impersonal tone that is
appropriate to an informative
essay; however, some sections
express bias or include
personal observations.

Frequently includes poor word
choices and/or repetitive
sentence structures; primarily
establishes a tone that is
subjective and personal
observations and opinions are
expressed frequently.

Consistently demonstrates
poor word choices and/or
repetitive sentence
structures; tone is
consistently subjective and
the essay is dominated by
personal observations and
opinions.

Conventions

Demonstrate command
of standard English
grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
and usage.

There may be a few negligible
errors in grammar,
punctuation, spelling,
capitalization, formatting, and
usage.

There are occasional minor
errors in grammar,
punctuation, spelling,
capitalization, formatting, and
usage.

There are some significant
errors in grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
formatting, and usage.

There are frequent significant
errors in grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
formatting, and usage.

There are consistent
significant errors in
grammar, punctuation,
spelling, capitalization,
formatting, and usage.

Think About Your
Writing

Demonstrates thoughtful
reflection; consistently
includes insights,

Demonstrates thoughtful
reflection; includes multiple
insights, observations, and/or

Primarily demonstrates
thoughtful reflection, but some
responses are lacking in detail

Shows limited reflection; the
majority of responses are
lacking in detail or insight;

Does not answer the
majority of reflection
questions or the majority of

  Advanced (100%) Proficient (85%) Acceptable (75%) Needs
Improvement (50%)

Non-
Performance
(0%)

Reply to reflection
questions thoroughly and
thoughtfully.

observations, and/or examples
in all responses; answers all
reflection questions
effectively, following or
exceeding response length
guidelines.

examples; answers all
reflection questions
effectively, following response
length guidelines.

or insight; answers all
reflection questions, primarily
following response length
guidelines.

answers reflection questions
inadequately: may not answer
all of the questions and/or may
not follow response length
guidelines.

answers do not follow
response length guidelines.

F. Requirements

• Your draft must be 3-4 page (approximately 700-1000 words)

• Guidelines must be followed or submission will not be graded

• Double-space your draft and use one-inch margins.

• Use an easily-readable 12-point font.

• All writing must be appropriate for an academic context.

• Your draft must be original and written for this assignment.

• Plagiarism of any kind is strictly prohibited.

• Your submission must include your name, the name of the course, the date, and the title of your draft.

• Your submission must include your answers to the “Think About Your Writing” questions

• Submit a only single file that contains all of the assignment components.

• Acceptable file formats include and x.

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